I have recently returned from an amazing adventure. An adventure that taught and challenged me in new ways. The challenge: Love deeper, give more. John 13:12 When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. “Do you understand what I have done for you?” he asked. A… [continue]

I am about to embark on a new adventure. It’s a trip I have been planning for months. It has been thought through and well planned. Yet the closer the time drew to my departure the more anxious I became. When I first made the decision to take this trip it was for all the right reasons; to help, to serve, to learn,… [continue]

 As I grew up I learned to work hard and through that work ethic I accomplished many things. Over the years I fell in love with the things that I  was able to accomplish. Even as I learned that I am saved by God’s grace I allowed my accomplishments to give me a false sense of security thus exposing my tendency… [continue]

Failure in the face of progress is like a big slap in the face. You think you are doing so well and then, wham! As I’ve been growing in compassion for others, trying to be more considerate and more vulnerable I have also been cut a lot deeper when hurt. I guess it comes with the territory but it definitely does not… [continue]

As I was reading a Christian book on the bus the woman next to me began to ask me for directions. Initially I kept my answer short, put my headphones back on and stuck my nose back in the book. A few seconds later something inside me moved. It was my conscience poking me and yelling, “What type of Christian are you?… [continue]

Every morning I wake up and set my priorities for the day. Sometimes these priorities are based on what happens, but on any given day I might have to re-prioritize. I prioritize what I will allow to occupy my thoughts, thus influencing resulting actions or inaction. My priorities are driven by what I want most. Sometimes… [continue]

I am learning how to love people outside of my comfort zone. The more I have been learning and relearning about God’s love and character the more it has awakened a desire in me to have a deeper concern for others.  However, the desire to have a deeper concern doesn’t always translate easily into action. It’s… [continue]

It takes great humility and vulnerability to get out of my own way and just obey. Day in and day out I have watched God answer prayers, specific prayers, some within hours of me writing them out, and yet I can still wake up on some mornings fearful, doubting or anxious. I can feel inadequate because I lack perfection the… [continue]

 I can be so nearsighted when it comes to God’s plan. I can let what’s right in front of me distract me from the bigger vision God has in mind.  The second I receive any sort of answer to even a part of a prayer I can quickly think I know the direction God is taking me; I know the rest so I can take… [continue]

I am a woman on a journey of learning how to make sure my reactions don’t deny Christ’s presence in me. I have been more fervent in this pursuit as of late because I see that people don’t care to meet my Jesus until they meet the reality of Jesus in my life. On this particular part of my journey this… [continue]

On any given day I can decide to look at the world and at myself from the vantage point of my past, how I grew up, how others view me. I can be negative and discontent about different aspects of my life. Today it could be my job, tomorrow a relationship. In contrast I can decide to view the world and myself in light of… [continue]

Often times in a given situation we know what the right thing to do is and we do it, but the question is why. I recently began to recognize the difference between doing the right thing because I intellectually know it is the right thing to do versus doing the right thing out of a deep desire to please and know God. When… [continue]

Mastering one’s emotions rather than being controlled by them is by definition self-control. I have not always practiced self-control, in fact in the past I have either completely let my emotions control me or stuffed them and pretended they were not there until they blew up in my face. Neither of these actions were… [continue]

Someone once said, “God will never give me more than I can handle- sometimes I wish he didn’t have so much trust in me.” This statement resonated with me this week as I applied lessons recently learned to face some people and situations from my past; to face past hopes and rejections. When applying these… [continue]

To trust means to rely on and be confident in. When I trust in myself I leave room in my life for rejection, which leads me to feel insecure and results in pride. I have had an interesting spiritual journey over the past few months. The more I have allowed God to thaw-out my heart and revitalize my faith the more I have… [continue]

We need tension to stretch and grow. However, how I respond and engage that tension is very important. To learn from the experiences I am faced with I must be willing to go through it completely. This includes acknowledging the emotions the experience invokes. As I juggled multiple changes in my life my first response was… [continue]

I find it ironic how simple and yet profound the concept of receiving is. I ‘get’ things all the time but getting and receiving are not the same thing. I may get a friend request from someone on facebook but I must choose to receive it. I may be dying of thirst and ask for a glass of water, but once I get it… [continue]

I have a strong sense of justice. It is this sense that fuels my passion for development work and for people in general. However, desiring justice for others and for myself can be a tricky thing. Desire for justice can often blind you. In the past when I have been hurt and felt that there was some injustice done to me or… [continue]

What I believe in my heart about myself deeply influences how I act. It’s kind of ironic because on a given day I can believe I am not worthy of love and act suspiciously towards anyone who tries to show me love while on another occasion I can, in my pride, think of myself higher than I ought; trusting in my own strength.… [continue]

After a hard year filled with significant work and relationship challenges all I really looked forward to was a new year that would be different. So my first prayer of the year was for a year filled with some happy and easy things, some rewards right here on earth and some earthly comforts. How ironic that as soon as I… [continue]

There are parts of my character that for the longest time I thought would change just because. I thought the longer I was a Christian certain behavior or attitudes would just kind of sink in eventually. That other’s positives would rub off on me.   Colossians 3:1 (NIV) Since, then you have been raised with… [continue]

I am trying to learn the art of pausing. The opportunity to practice the art of pausing presents itself in that split second moment between a given action towards me and my reaction. It’s part of the internal battle to be holy and reverent. In the past few years I have been losing this battle tragically, but for… [continue]

  "What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day..."Does it happen all at once or bit by bit?" [...] "It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp… [continue]

Anger can sometimes be a byproduct of fear. When I get hostile towards people, situations, and God, more often than not it is rooted in a deeper fear. While listening to a recent lesson it really dawned on me: “As I get ready to leave my job and continue to search for new opportunities I literally do not know where… [continue]

 My thinking can be really off sometimes. I have these days where I am literally fighting my own thoughts. I have to train my mind to think spiritually. This statement looks so simple and to the point on paper but in practice it is ridiculously hard! I’ve been praying very specific and bold prayers over the past… [continue]

Sometimes I have these moments when things just click into place in my mind. Seeds that were planted years ago finally sprouted, pushing through to the surface. I have always loved people deeply, at times, with all of my heart. As a result I would take on their hurts and pains as though they were my own. I would try to… [continue]

There are things I struggle with ever day. In each day I am faced with decisions to respond in a given way to a given situation. Sometimes the time frame for the decision seems to be only a split-second-window-of-opportunity to react. At other times I can contemplate my response for hours and still make the wrong choice.… [continue]

I’m at my launching point. The launching point is that moment when I must start acting on my goals. I have set some lofty goals for the next few months. I enrolled in a couple of different classes to help me grow in a couple of different areas of my life. I have decided to pursue my dream career. I decided to put… [continue]

I learned a new word recently. The word is hedonistic. It refers to people who are pleasure seekers and pain avoiders. I thought about all the little ways I can be hedonistic and how this correlates in my walk with God. There have been times in my life where I have sought out pleasure specifically to avoid… [continue]

When asked to help in a variety of circumstances recently, I found myself seriously pausing before responding. The pauses were those of hesitation. I honestly did not want to do whatever was being asked of me. They were all small tasks, but I found myself flashing back to my childhood and felt the same inner resistance… [continue]

I got sick a few weeks back--I got hit hard. I was sicker than I can remember being in a long time. I was unable to breathe or focus. I felt attacked physically. My difficulty breathing made it hard to sleep. After a few days I was exhausted in ways I did not think were possible and I felt hopeless about things in my life… [continue]

 It is so easy for me to get consumed by my thoughts or the situations in my life. I saw how I can do this when I allowed some of my insecurities to keep me up at night last week. I was preparing to leave for a weekend away and found myself consumed with the most ridiculous thoughts and hypothetical situations. Even… [continue]

Sometimes my dreams seem really far away. I know, that sounds like a cheesy line from a pop song, but it is also how I can feel. Waiting may be an important part of the process, but it is always the most torturous part for me. Sometimes the combination of waiting and feeling like I am wandering aimlessly can make me question… [continue]

It is never a matter of if I will struggle, but rather a question of when. When I do, the challenge then becomes whether it will drive me to God or to what I know - my self-reliance. When I have faced challenges lately I run to God instead of defaulting to my own mechanisms. I finally realized these challenges God has allowed… [continue]

When I want recognition at work from my team, or when I simply feel dissatisfied for no identifiable reason at all, I have to pause and ask myself who’s interest am I really considering - mine or others?   Philippians 2:3-4 (NIV) Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit […] look not only… [continue]

Sometimes, if my life circumstances are not what I would like them to be I can feel like I am being punished. I imagine myself asking God, “Why can’t things be different?” or “Why am I still in this place?” And in my mind He bellows, “Because I said so!”   This past week,… [continue]

Walls are built to keep predators out, but if not careful walls can keep the good out along with the bad. Walls can also serve to imprison those inside of them. The more I seek to draw closer to God the more I see how he has been bulldozing right through my walls over the past few months. I have seen how I can trust God… [continue]

In the same way that I sometimes doubt the voice on an answering machine is really mine when I hear it, I can also fail to see myself the way others view me. Recently, I have been learning how to pause and take the time to see how others may perceive me and what it reveals about my relationship with God. It came as a challenge… [continue]

I am a fighter. This can be a good thing or it can have its draw backs. It really all depends on what exactly I am fighting for. Recently, I realized I fight sometimes just for the sake of fighting. I want to fight simply to prove a point, or prove myself, or get something I want. I want my own way. I found myself fighting… [continue]

Sometimes I can feel like I am leaving my prayers on God’s answering machine and waiting for him to check his messages. I start to wonder, “did he listen to it and forget or is it just not as important as someone else’s message at the moment?” When I have these thoughts I know that they come from… [continue]