Does guilt ever get you in a headlock?
Do you ever feel pinned by your routine or that the obligation not to miss a single ballgame, recital, school function or bedtime story has you in a full-Nelson?
I have felt that way this week. I've been wrestling with motherhood. I have no idea what round this is, but I do know that I need a water break and I intend to emerge the victor!
God assures me that I can be victorious in motherhood. Society and Satan are not always so accommodating.
Though we are in the midst of summer events - camp, VBS, sports practices - we are entering the "back-to-school zone" that we all dread and I'm realizing all the fun summer items which I have yet to check off my list. I'm kicking myself for all the bedtime stories I haven't read because I let my six-year-old stay up late. I'm worried that everything won't get finished, purchased or reiterated before whatever deadline I have deemed appropriate.
Sadly, this is not just a yearly match. The battles are fought throughout the year. Daily.
All the wonderful aspects of motherhood we cling to from our fantasies; all the horror stories we've heard from relatives and friends; and even the warnings about most embarrassing moments Erma Bombeck warned us about don't come close to the real issues and pressures, joys and heartaches that we encounter in any given week.
I can't identify anything in particular that has been bugging me this week. It's just an overall feeling of inadequacy some moments and other times a bit of guilt or a dash of longing for a few minutes of alone time. But God has been faithful and each morning as I have had a devotion and prayer time (Very unusual for me in the mornings!), I have been refreshed, comforted and given a strategy for my day.
This week, rather than sharing one scripture for you to ponder or apply, I would encourage you to spend time in God's Word and let Him speak to you. Continue with any reading or devotion you are currently immersed in and ask God to speak to you through some part of it. If you are not in the midst of a specific study, pick up you bible and read a favorite passage and ask God to let you view it with fresh eyes, or ask God to lead you to a scripture He would have you apply in a new way this week. You might be surprised as the method He uses to lead you there.
Enjoy your ten minutes' peace (you Living Water break) and then get back in that ring and triumph over your maternal doubts. I'm working on pinning guilt to the mat right now!