I am trying to learn the art of pausing. The opportunity to practice the art of pausing presents itself in that split second moment between a given action towards me and my reaction. It’s part of the internal battle to be holy and reverent. In the past few years I have been losing this battle tragically, but for the most part because I was not fighting.
Rom7:14 (The Message) I can anticipate the response that is coming: "I know that all God's commands are spiritual, but I'm not. Isn't this also your experience?" Yes. I'm full of myself--after all, I've spent a long time in sin's prison.
I am a reactionary person. Sometimes this serves me well as I can respond quickly and think on my feet. However, at other points in time my response can lack gentleness and tact. I have been praying to be able to give more to others without fear of somehow losing myself or compromising my identity in the process. My response doesn’t always need to come from my gut because lets face it, my gut is not where my Spirit lives. When I react, the reaction comes from me and is about me versus being about God or even others.
Romans 8:5-8 (The Message) 5Those who think they can do it on their own end up obsessed with measuring their own moral muscle but never get around to exercising it in real life. Those who trust God's action in them find that God's Spirit is in them--living and breathing God! 6Obsession with self in these matters is a dead end; attention to God leads us out into the open, into a spacious, free life. 7Focusing on the self is the opposite of focusing on God. Anyone completely absorbed in self ignores God, ends up thinking more about self than God. That person ignores who God is and what he is doing. 8And God isn't pleased at being ignored.
When I am focused on God I am more mindful of the need to pause. I also desire to stop and listen for His voice before responding because I am thinking of Him and others. In practice this is incredibly hard but it is possible. It just takes focus. I realized that when I was a young Christian I spent a lot of time focusing on doing the right thing. Somewhere along the way I ended up on autopilot and in the process lost my reverence. It was as though I thought that the change would just sort of happen in me over time. This thinking is in direct contrast to what is written in Romans 7,8. I must set my mind on what the Spirit desires. It takes effort. This effort came in spurts in the past, but I am realizing it needs to be constant.
Proverbs 5:6-7 (NIV) 6 She gives no thought to the way of life; her paths are crooked, but she knows it not. 7 Now then, my sons, listen to me; do not turn aside from what I say.
I must give greater thought to my way of life. My life is composed of my responses and reactions. I must pause to listen for God’s voice to keep me on the right path, to help me identify the crooked path and ultimately know the difference. In the past I have loved those around me on my terms, in my way. For the most part it was what was comfortable for me. Despite this selfishness God has surrounded me with incredibly loving and giving people. However, I must learn to love them deeper and in a way that they need to be loved. I can exchange my personal fears for a healthier fear and reverence of God in order to do this. The above proverb instructs the reader to stay away from such a woman. In order to love the people in my life more deeply I must commit to working on my art of pausing daily, not only in the moments when it is convenient to me. After all, the effects and consequences of my actions are tremendous; they are eternal.
1Peter2:12 (NCV) People who do not believe are living all around you and might say that you are doing wrong. Live such good lives that they will see the good things you do and will give glory to God on the day when Christ comes again.