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Quiet Time
by Kasia Kedzia
I am generally an open and transparent person. I try to be honest, speak my mind and too often trust that those around me will do the same. However, I am learning that in the real world, that is in the working world, this is not always the case. So the hard lesson I am learning is that of office politics. Interestingly enough I am also seeing that Jesus did not lack his fair share of dealing with some of the very same politics I can face on a daily basis.
Matthew 10:16 (NIV) I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.
Some days at work can truly feel as though I have been thrown into a den of wolves. It can feel as though my every move is being scrutinized and some people are just waiting in the wings to pounce on any weakness I may show. This is a terrible feeling and sometimes it is genuine and invoked by those around me and other times, to be fair, it is invoked by my own insecurity. The problem I have is telling the difference. Regardless, one thing does hold true, I am faced with learning how to maneuver within my workspace, learn the work culture and politic accordingly without compromising my integrity. I am learning the meaning of being shrewd.
In the past when I would see the word shrewd it would automatically invoke images of sly or underhanded cartoon villains. However, as I looked up the definition it primarily refers to someone, “showing or possessing intelligence, insight, and sound judgment, especially in business or politics.”
Therefore I am learning how to be shrewd and yet retain a high standard of integrity so as to remain innocent. I am learning that I can be honest and yet not reveal everything. I am learning that silence or restraint (both in information and emotional reaction) can really translate into clout or even a degree of power/strength. As I read the gospel of John with the sole purpose to seek out how Jesus maneuvered through the politics of his time I couldn’t help but see how he showed restraint all the time! His strength and power were exemplified in his humility. The temptation by Satan is one example and his crucifixion the other. Not everyone is motivated to do the work the organization sets out to do to serve people. Some are just trying to get to their next career goal or acquire another title. This can make them unappealing, but it also makes some of them incredibly good at doing their work. Sometimes if I get caught up in motive I can let it distract me from doing my best.
Philippians 1:15-18 (NIV) 15 It is true that some preach Christ out of envy and rivalry, but others out of goodwill. 16 The latter do so in love, knowing that I am put here for the defense of the gospel. 17 The former preach Christ out of selfish ambition, not sincerely, supposing that they can stir up trouble for me while I am in chains. F3 18 But what does it matter? The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached. And because of this I rejoice. Yes, and I will continue to rejoice.
At the end of the day the motives of the people Paul addressed in his letter to Philippi did not matter as much as the end result- the Gospel being preached. I found myself being able to draw a similar comparison with my work. At the end of the day not everyone’s motives will be pure, but if the work for the good of the people is done then why should I dwell on it.
We do not live in a world filled with idealists. Lets face it, most of us are surrounded by a lot of self serving people, but we are still called to love them and to set an example. It is easy to fall into one extreme of naivety or the other of becoming self-serving myself. Therefore, I am learning to find this ridiculously hard balance and praying that God extends his grace while I do so.
At the end of the day all I can do is my best without compromising my integrity and not take other things going on around me personally. I just have to remember that my God will meet all my needs (Phil4:19) and sometimes I just have to pray:
Psalm 31:15 (NIV) My times are in your hands; deliver me from my enemies and from those who pursue me.
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Since those first days, I have made it out of the Projects, finished my Masters degree in International Development, and moved to DC to work in my field. As a young single Christian woman my struggles today are a little different than they were when I first came to know God, but who am I kidding, not much. It's the every day battle for my heart to be pure before God, to strive to please him, and help others to seek and know Him.
Over my years of a faithful walk with God I have received much grace and compassion and have been blessed beyond my wildest dreams. Through out it all one thing has stayed consistent: God's word. Through His word I have been inspired and it has kept me faithful even when faith seemed like a foreign concept and God seemed deaf to my prayers. I started emailing my Quiet Times which helped me stay accountable as I shared my struggles and fought for understanding. Some wrote back and said they too were inspired and could relate. I hope some of my times can help inspire others who are seeking and fighting just like I am, to get to heaven and take as many as possible with me along the way.
Like what your read? Check out my blog: http://stronggirlforlife.wordpress.com/
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