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Quiet Time
by Kasia Kedzia
When I rowed crew in college there was a quote up on the wall in our crew room that I always loved, it read, “Pain is Weakness Leaving the Body.”
With the exception to athletics, for the most part, when I think of suffering I definitely think of ways to avoid it. I mean suffering, hurting...anyone who enjoys those things is obviously masochistic and has serious problems. It’s like when your young and the doctor wants to prick your finger and says it will only hurt for a second. I never failed to express (loudly) my disagreement and question of his logic! Who gave this man a needle and a degree?
I run from suffering in order to seek comfort and yet God says that suffering draws us closer to him. In fact there are many scriptures that confirm an inseparable bond between suffering and comfort. Rom 5 is by far my least and most favorite passage of scripture for this very reason. Suffering and comfort are fundamental truths of God.
Unfortunately, it typically takes such extremes to teach me the basic fundamental truths about God and spiritual living. My need for God is comparable to my physical need for air and water, yet understanding this is the most difficult spiritual lesson to master, especially when I face trials of any kind. I would rather avoid feeling pain and expressing it, not wanting to look weak, then actually go through it.
When life doesn’t seem to be going according to plan (my plan) and those who I care about most seem the farthest away, I feel anguish and therefore automatically try to fix it (myself without God) - focusing on others' pain instead of my own. But I have dealt with suffering and God has gotten me through it over the years. As a result these types of trials have build my resilience as well as equipped me to be stronger. Sometimes doing the right thing means suffering – it can hurt to let go of things that are not good for us, people who hurt us, sometimes it’s even putting others first. I can try and be someone’s god, feel good about myself and feel comforted or I can endure through pain of letting go and entrusting others to God-- letting him carry them and myself as Isiah46 so greatly illustrates. See the more I suffer, the more I can die to my sinful nature (Rom7:14-18). When I can see past the suffering to Hope I can let go and surrender my momentary pain to God and work through it instead of running from it trying to avoid it.
Rom5:3-5 (NIV) 3 Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.
The Message version of this passage of scripture reads, “3 There's more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we're hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, 4 and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. 5 In alert expectancy such as this, we're never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary--we can't round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit!”
Marty Wooten once wrote, “Those who most powerfully experience the compassion of God and know him as “the God of all comfort” are those who meet him at the extremes of suffering. The Bible deals with suffering in a way completely different than the world. To the world suffering is a stumbling block that often confuses and disorients people, leaving most hopeless, despondent and bitter. However, to God suffering holds endless possibilities for spiritual growth. Peter says that suffering refines our faith 1Peter1:6-7.”
1Peter3:8-9 (the message) 8 Summing up: Be agreeable, be sympathetic, be loving, be compassionate, be humble. 9 That goes for all of you, no exceptions. No retaliation. No sharp-tongued sarcasm. Instead, bless--that's your job, to bless. You'll be a blessing and also get a blessing.
If I do not suffer I will be unable to be sympathetic or compassionate. I will fail to grasp the very nature of Jesus and the message of the cross. So although these past few days have been rough emotionally I am learning to embrace it so that I can get through it and continue to draw closer to God.
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Since those first days, I have made it out of the Projects, finished my Masters degree in International Development, and moved to DC to work in my field. As a young single Christian woman my struggles today are a little different than they were when I first came to know God, but who am I kidding, not much. It's the every day battle for my heart to be pure before God, to strive to please him, and help others to seek and know Him.
Over my years of a faithful walk with God I have received much grace and compassion and have been blessed beyond my wildest dreams. Through out it all one thing has stayed consistent: God's word. Through His word I have been inspired and it has kept me faithful even when faith seemed like a foreign concept and God seemed deaf to my prayers. I started emailing my Quiet Times which helped me stay accountable as I shared my struggles and fought for understanding. Some wrote back and said they too were inspired and could relate. I hope some of my times can help inspire others who are seeking and fighting just like I am, to get to heaven and take as many as possible with me along the way.
Like what your read? Check out my blog: http://stronggirlforlife.wordpress.com/
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