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Quiet Time

    by Kasia Kedzia

The Pay Off of Sacrifice
Date Posted: June 12, 2007

Most of us don’t really understand the concept of sacrifice. I’m pretty sure I don’t. When I was in High School I was already living on my own and had to work on weekends to save money for collage, in collage I supported myself and again had to work a lot. Long hours of study and work as well as pressure to succeed and simply survive resulted in a restricted social life. I felt like I was making the necessary sacrifices. As I finished school and began working, the pursuit of my career has resulted in a lot of moves and travel making it hard to settle down or get involved in a relationship. Traveling to Africa has been one of the most challenging and revealing experiences by far. Leaving behind the comforts of the western world to go and volunteer in a foreign place with a foreign culture has been hard in many ways. In those times I could think, “Your sacrifices will pay off. You will make a difference.” In those moments I still did not understand what true sacrifice was but Sudan has taught me a lot about the true meaning of sacrifice.

Hard work, study, any delay in experiencing immediate pleasure are all sacrifices that allow us to reap future rewards. This is how sacrifice is typically understood if we are honest enough with ourselves to admit it. So what I usually refer to as a sacrifice is really an investment in myself. But true sacrifice does not pay off materially. God can chose to let me prosper but I don’t earn prosperity with sacrifice.

Matt27:11-14 (NIV) 11Meanwhile Jesus stood before the governor, and the governor asked him, "Are you the king of the Jews?" "Yes, it is as you say," Jesus replied. 12When he was accused by the chief priests and the elders, he gave no answer. 13Then Pilate asked him, "Don't you hear the testimony they are bringing against you?" 14But Jesus made no reply, not even to a single charge - to the great amazement of the governor.
v26 Then he released Barabbas to them. But he had Jesus flogged, and handed him over to be crucified.

It’s easy to hear about Jesus’ sacrifice and take for granted his response as a ‘natural God response.’ This was his role to play. He took the physical and emotional abuse because it was who he was. But that’s not really true because we see throughout the bible that that is not who he was. Even though he went like a lamb to the slaughter his character was not one of meekness. Just look at:

Matt23:15 (NIV) Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You travel over land and sea to win a single convert, and when he becomes one, you make him twice as much a son of hell as you are.

Jhn8:44(NIV) You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father's desire. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.

Mtt16:23(NIV) Jesus turned and said to Peter, "Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men."

Matt21:12(NIV) Jesus entered the temple area and drove out all who were buying and selling there. He overturned the tables of the money changers and the benches of those selling doves.

Jesus didn’t tolerate being falsely accused, beaten, and crucified. When he allowed himself to be put to death as a sacrifice for our sins, he sacrificed his personality as well as his body. True sacrifice leaves us voulnrable but this voulnrability should not be mistaken for weekness. To genuinly sacrifice takes great strength and endurance.

I know it is hard for me to go against my character to do things differently, to chose humility instead of pride, or submission instead of rebellion. It is hard for me to “do” without expecting in return or wanting to see some type of results. But Jesus laid down his personality right there with his body when he laid down his life. He didn’t even argue. How did he prosper as a result? He already had a relationship with God and he was already worshiped.

When Jesus died so that I might be saved if I decided to follow him he got nothing in return. Nothing. No personal growth. No improved relationships. No profits. Nothing.

So what are the things you feel like you are/have sacrificed? Have they been true sacrifices? I am learning the difference slowly but surly by giving and not expecting in return, in fact giving in instances when I know full well there will be no return. Giving in this way is difficult, its down right painful! When you know that the receiver just doesn’t recognize your love or your acts of service and they may never fully understand the extent of your love, it is then that you learn true sacrifice, putting them before you, giving despite the lack of reciprocation. Whether you are giving to an individual or a village of people it does not matter- true sacrifice is an act of love. When I have felt the pain of true sacrifice I was able to draw closer to Jesus and appreciate his sacrifice for me in a more genuine and emotional way. Only when I remain focused and accept who it is that I am really serving am I able to sacrifice with a clear conscious and light heart.

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Biography Information:
Gods brought me a long way from the New York City Housing Projects. I studied the Bible, repented, and was baptized for the forgiveness of my sins when I was 17 and have been repenting and striving towards heaven ever since. The hardest thing about becoming a Christian at 17 was trusting that God would take care of me, meet my emotional teen needs, and help me overcome my enormous insecurity...what else would a teen girl have trouble with?

Since those first days, I have made it out of the Projects, finished my Masters degree in International Development, and moved  to DC  to work in my field. As a young single Christian woman my struggles today are a little different than they were when I first came to know God, but who am I kidding, not much. It's the every day battle for my heart to be pure before God, to strive to please him, and help others to seek and know Him.

Over my years of a faithful walk with God I have received much grace and compassion and have been blessed beyond my wildest dreams. Through out it all one thing has stayed consistent: God's word. Through His word I have been inspired and it has kept me faithful even when faith seemed like a foreign concept and God seemed deaf to my prayers. I started emailing my Quiet Times which helped me stay accountable as I shared my struggles and fought for understanding. Some wrote back and said they too were inspired and could relate. I hope some of my times can help inspire others who are seeking and fighting just like I am, to get to heaven and take as many as possible with me along the way.

Like what your read? Check out my blog: http://stronggirlforlife.wordpress.com/
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