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I grew up in a family, the oldest of 5 children. We spent many summer Sunday afternoon’s at the beach as a family, at a nearby lake. We would all pile into our van, which included my Grandparent’s and off we traveled for a day in the sun. What a noisy bunch we were! I love recalling the days of playing in the sand, eating picnic food, and running in and out of the water. I particularly recall one of my sisters who was very consistent in one area. She would run in and out of the water and would yell, “Watch me Daddy, watch me Daddy.” My Father would call out, “I see you, I see you,” each time she called to him. I believe my sister was checking to see, if our Father saw her as an individual in the midst of a large family. To me this is a healthy family scenario. Although this was years ago, times are no different today. Our children need to feel, that as an individual they are important to their earthly Father, who can then teach them about their heavenly Father.

As Christian adults, we also must learn that we are important to our Father, God. God our Father sits in heaven, watching over us, and cares for each one of us, as individuals. If we grew up in a family where our Father did not acknowledge us as an individual, or was absent in our life, this may affect our adult life as a Christian. We cannot understand why a Father, who we cannot see, loves us, cares for us, and desires what is best for us, if we had an earthly Father that rejected us. If this is the case, we may begin to seek approval in areas that are not God honoring. This keeps us separated from our Father, God and growing a close relationship with the God who loves us.

At times we may also begin seeking approval from those around us, such as supervisors whom we work for, wives, husbands or various Christian leaders. We may serve in the role of Pastor, who is constantly seeking the approval of the congregation. By living this way, we may become discouraged if the people we seek approval from do not live up to our expectations. Seeking approval can also become an addiction, which may cause us to become discouraged and depressed when a person(s) does not acknowledge us and affirm us continuously. It is in the midst of this type of thinking that we must begin to learn to live a new way. Otherwise, we will never know the love that Christ has for us, and find the joy of seeking his approval above all else.

Suggestions to learn to live a new way?

* We must first ask the Lord if we are a person that is seeking approval of others instead of seeking the approval of God. People approval is something that can lurk quietly behind the scenes of our life and we may not realize that it is part of our life.

*Go to him in prayer and begin reading the word. Trust that “the Father” through the Holy Spirit will show us the truth about our inner life and if we are seeking man’s approval instead of, “The Father’s.”

*If the Holy Spirit begins to reveal to us, through prayer and the word, that we are seeking the approval of man instead of God we can then;

1- Ask the Lord what steps to do to change this type of thinking.

2- Confess this struggle to someone that we trust.

3- Begin to pray, asking God to send people to help you with this issue.

4- Find a group study to be involved in. Remember; a group that is a fit for one

person, may not be God’s choice for another. Groups do not come in a one size

fits all design. Don’t feel like a failure if you must try more than one group.

5- Most importantly we must thank God for showing us what needs to be changed

in our life and remind ourselves, that we ALL are being transformed daily. Secondly, never, never give up, God loves us, and desires us to be the best that we can be for Him.

Scripture-

Acts 5:29-32; Peter and the Apostles, Key verse 5:29

Philippians 4:18; Pleasing to God

Thought for further meditation and study- Take a look at the disciples. When Jesus called them, they left behind their fishing business. Do you think that everyone watching approved of them leaving everything behind to follow a carpenter? When they left behind their life of fishing, they followed the plan for their life orchestrated by God the Father. The first part of the plan for the life of the disciples was to be in the fishing business. The second part of their life began, when Jesus came along. They began to live their life of following Jesus fishing for men. They were to be God pleasers and not man pleasers!

Specifically take a look at Peter; He followed Christ closely and at a strategic time, when Jesus went to the cross Peter denied him! Could it have been that he was not only afraid of dying himself, but that he did not want to live a life of feeling the disapproval of others around him?

Coming Soon

#2- What does extending healthy affirmation and approval as a leader look like?

#3- What does receiving healthy affirmation and approval look like?

"Point of Reference" from Fred Price

Counting the Cost and Bearing the Cross