Subscription Lists

a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance

Bright and early on June 12,1993, I was stirred from my sleep by a ringing telephone. It was my friend Debbie on the other end yelling, "We're having puppies!" Her dog Hailey had gone into labor and soon I would be the proud owner of a baby Westie puppy. I remember throwing on my clothes and racing over to her house to witness what I will always describe as a miracle... the gift of life.

For the next six weeks, I would stop by Debbie's house as often as I could to watch these little puppies grow. I had "pick of the litter" and I knew right away which one I wanted. She was the only little girl in the litter with 3 brothers. I decided to call her Shelby. She was the cutest little dog I had ever seen. I will never forget the day I brought her home. I had every intention of crating her, although I hadn't quite made the commitment of purchasing a crate. Instead, I had a big cardboard box next to the bed. I remember putting in a blanket, a ticking clock, and a hot water bottle... all the things the experts tell you will help a little puppy adjust from being away from their mother.

All it took was about 30 seconds of her crying for me to reach down into that box and place Shelby on my chest. She never did go back into the box. She had me at that moment and I was never the same.

Over the next 13 years, Shelby would see me through good times and bad times. I'm not sure why, but it seems like the bad times end up being the road marks we use to look back at when thinking of time passing. For me, it was divorce, moving far away from home, losing several jobs, financial struggles, and a few bad break ups. Through it all, Shelby was there. She never left my side. She was a great source of comfort. I knew no matter what kind of day I had faced, she would be there at the door to greet me with kisses.

In 2004, I learned Shelby had Cushing's Disease. There isn't a cure for Cushing's, but it can be managed to some degree with medicine, but it would require a lot of diligence and work. I made the commitment to see Shelby through it. For the next two years, Shelby would constantly battle infection from every angle. She was a real trooper. She fought with every ounce of strength she had. Even with her illness, she would always make me laugh when she would run in circles around the table in the dining room and then around the coffee table in the living room. Back and forth she would run and run. It never failed to bring a smile to my face.

She also had several favorite toys a red rope, a red dinosaur with squeaky eggs, but we both loved the gorilla that made gorilla sounds when you squeezed it. It was quite funny to see the face of my guests when Shelby would pull this toy out and surprise them with its sounds. It always made us laugh.

Over the last two months, Shelby got weaker and weaker. She could no longer go up the steps or down the steps. She would sometimes stare at the wall lost in her own little world. A couple of weeks ago, it occurred to me that she was no longer playing with her toys or running in circles. It broke my heart because I knew that after two years of fighting the disease, Shelby was tired.

On November 18,2006, I had to make one of the hardest decisions I've ever made in my entire life - to end my little dog's suffering.

I can't even begin to describe the sadness I felt and still feel.

I had no idea how to pray.

But I knew the Spirit was at work on my behalf.

And Jesus was and is my source of comfort.

It's been a little over a week and still I am sad. I'm not crying as much, but the tears do come from time to time. The hardest part for me is when I come home from work and I think about my furry little friend who always greeted me at the door. Every time I walk into the kitchen I think about the treats that used to sit on the counter and how excited Shelby would get when she knew she was going to get one. I think I hear her when I lay down to go to sleep or when I'm getting ready in the mornings.

I miss her.

She brought so much joy into my life. I know she truly was a gift from God. She showed me what it means to love even when you don't feel like it. She showed me what it means to love through trials. She showed me how to laugh. She showed me grace and mercy. She blessed me more than I ever imagined.

She left paw prints on my heart and I know I will never be the same. I will always love her.

Dear Father in Heaven, thank You that we can come to You with all our hurts and we can trust You to comfort us. Thank You for the gift of friends and loved ones who mourned with me and helped comfort me. Thank You for the gift of furry friends and the unconditional love they show us. I do believe it is only a small glimpse of the love You have for us. I thank You Lord for Shelby and the precious years You gave us to share together. I love You Lord and give You all the praise and glory. Amen.

"'Christ in You...'" from Dale Krebbs

Origin Of Nations