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Single Minded
by Michelle Brinson
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7 NIV
In Paul’s letter to the Philippians, he makes it very clear that we should not be anxious about anything. Instead we should pray and petition God, be thankful and share our needs with God. The result is peace.
Right now I am desperate for peace. I’d give just about anything to have peace.
I’m going through a very dark time in my life. I’d say to describe it as “the valley of the shadow of death” sounds about right. I’m anxious all the time. I’m confused. I’m afraid. I’ve had two panic attacks in the past week.
If you’ve never had a panic attack, it can be very scary. In the Wikipedia listing for panic attacks, it says, “Experiencing a panic attack has been said to be one of the most intensely frightening, upsetting and uncomfortable experiences of a person's life.” I can attest to the fact that this is true.
I recently went to the doctor for a full physical. I have felt for several months that something wasn’t right. I didn’t know what it was, but I just didn’t feel right. I went to the doctor almost hoping they’d tell me that I had diabetes or a thyroid problem. Anything that might explain what’s going on with me would help. Or at least I thought it would.
I guess the good news is that they didn’t find anything terribly wrong with me, other than high cholesterol. But that didn’t really explain the constant sweating I have been experiencing. It didn’t explain the difficulty sleeping, the frequent trips to the bathroom, the brain fog, the constant feeling of being on edge, being tired all the time and constant body aches. I have blamed all of this on just too much going on in my life in terms of work and having a 16-month-old son. But after doing some additional research, I believe the answer lies in the word “anxiety.”
Most people will tell you that anxiety is a normal reaction to stress. But when that stress is constant, and the anxiety becomes excessive and constant, the consequences are not good.
This perfectly describes where I am right now.
I’ve been trying to find healthy ways to cope. I made another doctor’s appointment hoping she could help me. I’ve been seeing a Christian counselor. She has helped me in a HUGE way. I’ve been reading the Bible, singing praise songs and praying.
Today is Thanksgiving. It’s a day for us to express our thankfulness for all the blessings we’ve received.
I hate to admit this. I’ve prayed and presented my requests to God. But I have been extremely anxious and I haven’t offered any thanksgiving to God. I think I’m getting in the way of God blessing me.
Father God in Heaven… I’m so sorry for being so anxious. I’m so sorry for not expressing my thankfulness for the many blessings you’ve bestowed upon me. Please forgive me. I love you Jesus. I know you love me too. Even when I don’t feel it, you are here holding me. Thank you Jesus… thank you for saving my life, for loving me and for giving me this perfect, amazing, exciting and challenging little boy who lights up my life in ways I never imagined. Thank you for letting me be his mom. God, I submit all my fears and anxiety upon you. I know your yoke is easy and light. Thank you for the gift of peace. I’m seeking You and your peace with all my heart.
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Michelle sees her marriage as a ministry and desires for it and herself to be used by God. She and her husband and son are active members of their church. She is also passionate about spreading the good news locally as well as internationally via mission trips to East Africa and wherever else the Lord leads.
Michelle is a talented writer and speaker who prays God will use her in sharing His hope and truths to those who are hurting and in need of love.
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