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One of the greatest responsibilities we have is encourage and uplift others in our circle of influence. Whether we're parents, bosses, friends or leaders, we have an obligation to help others to live up to their full potential.

And whether you realize it not, with everything we say and do, we're influencing – either positively or negatively -- the people we care about. I guess that's why my parents often told me to "think before I speak."

While the words "I'm sorry" can often help heal the pain from a harsh word spoken, they can never remove the pain that was already inflicted. The best we can do is to realize the power of our speech and to speak with consideration and intention. And as my mom used to say, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."

So, to help you get started, here are some ways you can help others see and realize the best that's within them:

Believe in Them
We all have self-doubts from time to time. Our confidence is shaken. We lack the faith in our talents and skills to go for an important promotion or pursue that dream that keeps us awake at night. Having someone believe in you at these times is priceless. It can make all the difference in the world.

Encourage Them
"You can do it." "I know you can." We don't hear these words often enough, nor do we speak them often enough to someone else. Sincere encouragement can go a long way in helping someone stay the course. The more specific you are, the better the results. "I remember when you survived that horrible weak of mishaps and deadlines. I'm willing to bet you'll do even better this time."

Expect a Lot of Them
I can't tell you how many times I've been told to not get my hopes up. We're encouraged to have realistic expectations. But when it comes to helping others operate at their best, we sometimes have to up-a-notch our expectations. This can be taken to extremes, but there are many times when a teacher, a parent or even a boss has required more of us than we thought we were capable. And we've risen to the challenge which enabled us to see further than before.

Tell Them the Truth
And tell it with compassion. In Ephesians 4, verse 15, Paul tells us "Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ." We often avoid telling the hard truth because we don't want to upset anyone. We want to be nice. But telling the truth is a loving act. You may be the only person who can or will say to another what needs to be said. And you can confront someone without being combative. I have a few dear friends in my life who I know will always speak the truth in love with me. Their actions have demonstrated their love for me but also that they are unbiased commitment to God's truth and to sharing that with me.

Be a Role Model – Set a Good Example
One of the best ways we influence is by our own actions. Who we are speaks much more loudly than what we say. Actions do speak louder than words. Don't think people aren't watching you. They are. And they are consciously or unconsciously noticing everything about you. We automatically emulate our role models. And we are all role models to someone -- so let us be good ones.

Share Yourself
Too often, we miss the value of sharing our failings. We don't want to be vulnerable so we hold back. In doing so, we deprive others of our experience, our learning and our humanity. When you share from your own experience -- especially your failures -- you increase empathy, you're more approachable and you increase your ability to relate to others. I know in the past I've felt more connected and safe with people who are willing to open up and share real life experiences than I am to those who don't seem real or are shallow.

Challenge Them
The word "challenge" may conjure up some negative connotations. However, the meaning I'm using here is, "a test of one's abilities or resources in a demanding but stimulating undertaking." We all need to be challenged from time to time. Doing it for another is an art form. Go too far and it will backfire. Go too easy and you will appear patronizing. Remind people of their commitment to being their best and state your challenge. "I challenge you to overcome these unimportant opinions and get on with the real task at hand, get the job done, make the commitment, etc."

Ask Good Questions
A good therapist or coach doesn't tell their clients what to do. They ask good questions in order for the client to understand themselves better, to get clear on what the issue is and from there to make good choices. You can do the same. By asking thought-provoking questions, you cause people to think and come up with solutions. They'll appreciate it. And be sure to listen attentively.

Acknowledge Them
You find what you are looking for. If you're looking for the best in someone, you'll see it. If you're looking for their weaknesses, you'll see those. Catch people doing things right and tell them. When we acknowledge the good deeds of others, they tend to do more of them. Write a note. Send a card. Give them a call. Praise them in front of others. It makes people feel valued and special when they are acknowledged and it doesn't cost you a dime.

Spend Time with Them
We love what we give our time to. By devoting your most precious resource (time) to another individual, you're showing them you truly value them and your relationship with them. Invest time in your relationships; it's what life is made of.

So today, I challenge you – find someone who needs some encouragement and be Jesus with skin on – show them the love of Christ through your words and your deeds. If Jesus were here, do you think He would do the same for you? I do!

"'Christ in You...'" from Dale Krebbs

Origin Of Nations