Subscription Lists

"So, why aren't you married?"

If you're like me, and you're single, you too have been asked this question – or at least a question like this one more times than you care to count. Sometimes it's more subtle – "so are you married?" To which you answer "no," and if they don't follow with the question of "why not?" – you can almost hear it running through their mind in the awkward silence that follows.

As insensitive as the question may be – I have to remind myself the reason most of these people are asking is out of concern for my happiness. Despite their concern, I think what bothers me more than anything when asked this question is the implication there is something wrong with being single and that getting married will somehow solve it.

Behind this line of questioning is the thought that has been planted in the mind of many singles "there must be something wrong with me because I'm not married." It's the belief that no one finds us attractive, no one wants to share their life with us, and no one loves us. And with each wedding invitation we receive, we find ourselves wondering "what's wrong with me?" "When will it be my turn?" "Why not me?"

But when I take a step back from this line of thinking and look at the big picture, I realize there isn't something wrong with just us single people, there's something wrong with all of us. Instead of finding our value in Christ, we've been mislead into finding our value in things and in people. Unfortunately, when we let things of this world determine our worth, we will ultimately and always end up feeling let down, disappointed and empty.

While the world has taught us much of getting married and living happily ever after, Scripture teaches us something different when it comes to why we are here and why God created us.

In the book of Ephesians, I believe Paul makes it abundantly clear as to why God created us. Over and over Paul says in Chapter One, "to the praise of His glory." God didn't have to make us – but He did. He didn't need us – but He wants us. Why? "To the praise of His glory." Then what does God want from us? Micah 6:8 reads "He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God." Some of the last words Jesus ever spoke were to tell us to "Go into all the world and preach the good news to all creation."

Jesus didn't tell us to get married and live happily ever after. He wants us to praise Him, to be evidence of Him to everyone we meet and to share His message of hope with the rest of the world. God created us to unite ourselves with Him and to become "one with him in spirit" – to be His hands and His feet.

It has become my desire to use my singleness in devotion to God instead of spending my time wondering and worrying about when will I get married. I'm praying God will show me how to become "one with him in spirit" and how I can become His hands and His feet.

While I might not have a vow from a husband, I do have many promises from the Creator of the Universe:
"Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." (Hebrews 13:5)
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)
That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. (Romans 10:9)

So do you. You have these same promises. All you have to do is believe. The question is will you say "I do!"?

"Word from Scotland" from Sandy Shaw

Experience and Understand the Significance of Pentecost