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The Way

    by Kevin Pauley

Dating
Date Posted: July 20, 2020

Some time later, he fell in love with a woman named Delilah, who lived in the Sorek Valley. - Judges 16:4 HCSB

Samson, for all his miraculous strength, was a sucker for bad girls. On three occasions, he chose a woman based on her looks and all three times he was betrayed.[1] If you are in that phase of life when dating is an option, date people who will help you pursue tzedekah (righteousness). Date those who, like you, call on the Lord from a pure heart.[2] It is not only unwise to date someone who doesn't love God – it is a direct violation of God’s command.[3] After all, how can a Christian be a partner with one who doesn't believe?[4]

Besides the obvious prohibition against dating unbelievers, also be cautious of dating someone who claims to be a Christian, but doesn't live it.[5] For example, avoid dating people who have a bad temper.[6]

Contrary to the world’s ubiquitous message, inner beauty counts the most.[7]Jacob was attracted to Rachel because she was physically beautiful.[8]She grew jealous of Leah, abused her power over her slaves, was selfish, and willing to hire her husband out as a stud to get what she wanted! She even stole and lied![10] He should have imitated Yahweh who is not fooled by a person’s outsides but primarily considers the person’s inner beauty.[9] Rachel turned out to be a real witch!

Date someone with a good attitude, someone who will unite with you in glorifying God.[11] Date someone who encourages you and is supportive.[12] In a dating relationship, don't be exclusive; care about others too.[13]

Let the relationship progress step by step.[14] On dates avoid “deeds of darkness”. Make sure your activities may be described as decent; things you would not be ashamed of doing in front of the Lord Jesus.[15]

Dating should not include a sexual relationship.[16] You need to keep yourself pure[17] so that you can keep from hurting yourself. In order to do this place all your sexual desires and activities under Christ’s control. [18]

If you have already gone too far physically, what should you do? First, acknowledge your sin.[19]Third, quit the sin. Don’t do it anymore.[21]Last, believe that God has indeed forgiven you and quit feeling guilty.[22] Second, ask forgiveness for your sin. God says you can start over again.[20]

Trust me, loving God has a mate for you.[23] Ask the Lord for a mate[24] and He will give you your heart's desires. He knows what those are better than you do.[25]


[1] Judges 14:1-3 cp 14:17; 16:1-2; 16:4 cp 16:16-18

[2] 2 Timothy 2:22

[3] 2 Corinthians 6:14-15

[4] Amos 3:3

[5] 1 Corinthians 5:11; 2 Thessalonians 3:6

[6] Proverbs 22:24

[7] 1 Peter 3:3-4

[8] Genesis 29:17-18

[9] 1 Samuel 16:7

[10] Genesis 30:1,3-6,14-16; 31:34-35

[11] Romans 15:5-6

[12] Philippians 2:1-2

[13] Philippians 2:4

[14] 2 Peter 1:5-7

[15] Romans 13:12-14

[16] 1 Corinthians 6:13,18

[17] 1 John 3:2-3

[18] 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5

[19] Psalm 51:2-4

[20] Psalm 51:7-12

[21] 1 Corinthians 6:9-12

[22] Psalm 32:1-6

[23] Genesis 2:18

[24] Proverbs 19:14

[25] Psalm 37:4; Matthew 6:8

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Biography Information:
I make no claim of superior wisdom or originality. I am a student, just like everyone else. My goal in writing is to simply share whatever God chooses to teach me (many times by my children or parishioners) on any given day. I hope the devotionals are a blessing to you.

Kevin Pauley is a pastor and writer. He lives in Illinois with his wife, Lynn, their five children and two dogs. His internet address is Berea.
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